Greetings
Let me tell you about some of the issues I have been having (Nothing serious, Mostly amusing). Let us start where all good stories begin, at the beginning. This is a tale of False Confidence, Forgetfulness, 7 Cartridges, 5 Reams of Paper and an Evil Machine. (For real do you remember that episode of How I Met Your Mother where Marshal runs to beat the machine? It's like that but with a printer.)
It started out easy enough Print double-sided like a book so I can bind it and send it. 'Jamie!' I hear you say ' that's not that hard. Surely you got this.' Well, I am here to tell you I most certainly did not have it. As most of you know I have a shitty brain that, on one hand, has created this wonderful book and on the other is a SCATTER BRAINED WEIRDO WHO CAN'T AND WON'T BEABLETOFLIPTHISFUCKINGPAPERON THE FUCKING SHORT EDGE SO THE FUCKING WORDS ARE BACKWARDS AND NOT IN THE CORRECT FUCKING ORDER AND I JUST FUC......
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(Hi, this rant goes on for a while but basically, due to Jamie having a whole host of mental illness he couldn't do this simple task and has gotten someone else to do it as in his partner who, while they hate technology, are a wizard with printers. Love Future Jamie)
Now during this printing fiasco, the printer ran out of ink during a print. We didn't realise you can't change the ink mid-print. Yes, even when the flip needed to be done. Oh and then IFUCKEDUPTHEFUCKINGFLIPAAGAIN... .... ..... (Please see the above parenthesis)
Now Back with the printer. During one of the failed prints I noticed that chapter 12 was floating by itself, when I bound my first book there were two-chapter 12s, so I thought it was that. It wasn't. It turned out that I had loaded a different version and had sent Erin (My editor) the wrong one. Anyway, The books are coming including Chapter 12.
On this journey, I have made plenty of mistakes. The chief of which is TRUSTING THAT FUCKING PRINTER. I'm not even kidding this printer has given my partner and me nothing but trouble. Sometimes it just fucks up for no reason. But, that being said, I have managed to print two books. I have wasted so much paper and ink, so I must order more. Right, on to the bookbinding. Yeah, that has been a whole thing all by itself. I bought the wrong things. I tried to be economical by buying some wood and some G-clamps. Below are some pictures of my first attempt.
As you can see it's not the best. The pages weren't in line, and some of the pages weren't even glued. I said to myself "Jamie you can't sell this." And I was right. back to the drawing board. So after a few minutes of scouring Amazon and Etsy, I finally found one.
Now all the pages are in line. So yeah this is my book press. I now officially have one book made. 4 more to go. But this has now opened up a new thing for me. I'm going to be making Dungeons and Dragons notebooks as I have all of the stuff I need, so at least there is that. Anyhow, I'll let you guys know more once more has been done.
P.S THE BADGES HAVE ARRIVED. HERE'S A PIC
I hope you are all well I know I am. When last we spoke I informed you that the devil printer was playing ball. And truth be told it was. We had reached a peace agreement after a number of Blood sacrifices to the Infinite Printer Gods, Old and New. But (Pause for dramatic effect) I am here to tell you all, that I put that fucking printer where it fucking belongs. Melting in the Fires of Mount Doom in Mordor.
The good news is I have gotten a new Printer which is 10000000000000000000000000 times better than that demonic printer. So yeah things are going well. Here is my new Printer. (Future Jamie here, the one who is collating, It was not 1000000000000000000000000 better it was like 10 times better. We still faced some issues and just decided to photocopy the last three books)
Thank you for reading The Printer from Hell Saga. Honestly, I just needed a way to vent some frustration, and this is far funnier than just yelling. (This is once again Future Jamie)
Anyway Love you all
Jamie
Tempus Non-Stat Pro Homine
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